I've debated whether or not to post this. I like to keep the blog upbeat and positive. But I've learned over the years that there's a fine line between constant positivity and B.S. No one's life is perfect. No one gets everything they want every time. Life is about celebrations AND disappointments and learning lessons along the way.
I did not make the Kaisercraft design team. It was disappointing. While I'm very proud to have made it to the Top 25, obviously I wasn't what they were looking for. And after seeing the entries of those who were selected for the final team, I can see why. That's not my style. I was trying to make my style fit their product, and it just wasn't going to happen. I should've known when I received the product they wanted me to use for my final entries...it's not something I would've ever chosen to create with.
It started me thinking about what my "style" really is. I've never really been able to describe it because it seems to change all the time. Sometimes it's influenced by other scrappers, by the product I'm working with, by what I've seen in a magazine -- it's constantly evolving.
I looked back at the layouts I did early on, before I started the whole publication and design team pursuit. They're much cleaner and simpler than what I do now. I miss that. It was much faster...much less pressure...much more "me."
One thing I say a lot is: I am who I am...take it or leave it. I'm honest (probably to a fault) and opinionated and outspoken. I'm easily distracted, impulsive and moody. I'm most definitely NOT a perfect mother or wife or employee or volunteer. And I'm okay with that. Because the people who matter don't mind, and the ones who mind don't matter.
And that's the attitude I need to have about crafting/scrapbooking/etc. I need to be true to me and to my style -- whatever that is. If I inspire someone along the way, that's fabulous. But the reason I started doing this (and the reason I will keep doing it) is because I love what I create. It makes me happy. And that's enough.
In the interest of full disclosure, I'll leave you with one of the projects I created for my Kaisercraft entry, using their new "Velvet" line. It's nice, but it's not "me."
I do really love the flower I created using a strip of black lace and a Gluber.
I doubt this layout will ever be in my scrapbook...I think I can do something with this photo that I'll love much more. Maybe something simple...